Thursday, April 12, 2012
My blood is boiling this morning. Last night during an interview on CNN a democratic adviser attacked Ann Romney as not understand women's problems because "she has never worked a day in her life." It takes a great deal to offend me and this does. If raising 5 boys, serving in church and community, and battling breast cancer AND multiple sclerosis is not work, I don't know what is?!?
All this hullabaloo made me reflect on the choice I made to be a mother and the choices Ken and I made for me to be able to stay home with our kids. I always knew I wanted to be a mother and raise a family. Much of this had to do with the example of my own parents.
My mom and dad are fantastic! My mother especially was a powerful example of someone making many sacrifices for her family. I didn't really know it at the time, but financially it was tight at our house. For my parents it was a priority for my mom to be home with the kids. Now having 4 children myself, I understand how difficult that is. In fact, I have called my mother many times to apologize for things I'm sure I did as a kid and now I am experiencing those same things with my kids. Through my parents priorities, I could tell that family was the most important thing.
When Ken and I were first married the plan was for him to continue with his schooling, to get the advanced degrees, etc. that it would take to allow him to be a college piano professor. After being married a few years and many conversations about the family we wanted to have, we came to realize that our original plan would be very challenging. It would require me to work outside the home for many years to support him through school. It took Ken almost a year to make the decision to get his master's in information systems instead. We hoped through that path, we wouldn't have to put off having our family longer than necessary and that he would be able to get a job that would support our family. I know this was a great sacrifice for him to make. He chose to put off his dreams primarily for me to have the opportunity to stay home and raise our future children. Just one of the MANY reasons I love him.
Staying home with 4 children is difficult, but extremely rewarding. To be honest, sometimes I am jealous of Ken for getting to work adults everyday. I admit I have shed many a tear that almost every job I do is quickly undone. There is always another diaper to change, meal to make, more dishes to do, more dirty laundry, more crumbs on the floor, and ALWAYS messes to clean up. (Will I ever be able to look out the back door without the dirty hand smudges?) Luckily the awesome parts of kissing "owies", trips to the park, reading stories, snuggling when they don't feel good, and the joy of watching our children be happy and succeed far outweighs the other stuff.
Yeah, it's work. Being a mother is hard. It is a constant balancing act. But it is so worth it! It is the most important thing I could EVER do. I am always trying to improve and I have a long way to go in being a great mom. But this I do know, despite my many failings, I am the best one to love and care for my children. I am lucky that Ken agrees and supports me in my job as I support him in his. Families are eternal and the job of teaching, caring for, and loving my family is one I am incredibly blessed to have.